<> Ask the Pastor Rev. Walter Snyder Q: How many pastors does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one. Any more than that and they'll start comparing congregations and never get around to the job. I didn't say that all the questions would be weighty and theological. But this query does lead to consideration of what brings the chuckle gossip. Unfortunately, the clergy are not immune to this or other sins. Neither is anyone else. The setup could have said "doctors," "plumbers," "teachers," etc. The comparisons would be of "patients," "customers," "students," and so on. Loose tongues are so prevalent that we scarcely notice their wagging. The Epistle of James throws a harsh light on unchecked gossip. Not only does it tear down those to whom it's directed, but it also lowers the participants. As the wartime proverb says: "Loose lips sink ships." Loose lips can also sink friendships. Thankfully, the Savior who had forgiving words to answer the hateful words of His killers also has forgiveness for us who speak ill of others. Q: I was in the hospital for a few days. I was hurt when my minister didn't visit me. What should I do? A: First of all, did your minister know that you were hospitalized? Often, a pastor finds out that a member of his church was hospitalized when asked to pray for that person the next Sunday. The hospital may ask your religious preference upon admission, but they don't call to let your minister know. If it's a scheduled admission, tell your pastor ahead of time. If it's an emergency, you may need to call from the hospital or trust your family or friends to do it for you. Often, the hospital will call if you ask them to do so. Perhaps you have been blaming your minister for something of which he is entirely unaware. However, it could be that your minister knew and still didn't come. Sometimes church members give the impression that they'd rather the pastor not bother and then wonder why he doesn't. At other times, ministers may wrongly prioritize. Hospital time is seldom enjoyable, and the worries and doubts that accompany even "routine" procedures can be intense. If your minister found other ways to spend his day, gently tell him that you would have deeply appreciated his being with you. Let him know that even a short visit with a prayer and a few words of Scripture would have meant very much. Then be willing to forgive and to pray that the Lord will direct him to be more conscientious in the future. Q: I've seen your picture in the paper with that white collar. But I've also seen you around town in other clothes. When do you have to wear that collar? A: Actually, I don't have to wear it at all. In the Lutheran Church, as in many others, clergy dress is determined by the preferences of the pastors and the standards of the congregations and communities in which they live. Some church bodies require or strongly recommend certain apparel. No matter what, we hope that our ministers will refrain from wearing anything that brings disrespect to the office they hold. Personally, I like wearing my collar. I'm planning on buying more clergy shirts in the coming months. One nice thing about my collar is that I get to meet a lot of people who just want to talk about religion, or who figure that a "priest" has to stop and be nice. (Yes, some people don't realize that Episcopalians, Lutherans, and others also wear special clergy clothing.) The collar also tells hospital staff (see the question above) that I'm probably supposed to be in the ICU. The collar is also a reminder to me that I am a representative of my congregation and, especially, of my God. It's one more help to get me to mind my Ps and Qs. Finally, a closet full of clergy shirts helps alleviate the worry, "What am I going to wear today?" That's it for this week. If you have more questions about dressing for clergy success or anything else, remember to "Ask the Pastor." Have a blessed week in the Lord! Walter Snyder is a Lutheran pastor and coauthor of "What Do Lutherans Believe? A Study Guide in Christian Teachings for Adults." Copyright (c) 1995 by Walter P. Snyder Permission is granted by author to reproduce or retransmit this by any means, provided that its content is not altered, that this notice of copyright and permission is included, and that no financial gain is realized.